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[ZT]为什么会前途茫茫,两手空空

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛为什么会前途茫茫,两手空空
-- 前途在哪里?

看了"我的问题在哪里?"朋友的帖子,我感受颇深。在现实中这位朋友的困惑不仅
仅只是她一个人的困惑,而是我们很多人的经历。 我的很多朋友都很优秀,无论是
在中国还是美国,一路上顺利的从名牌学校出来,进名牌公司或者国家部委,考T考
G出国留学,拿高薪住大房子。可是很多人在工作了一段时间以后,却困惑的很,忽
然不知道自己想要什么,每每说起来工作就是:“I am sick and tired of what
I am doing。”但是日子还是一天天过下去,我们也一天天在变老。

看看我自己,在这样的困惑中挣扎很久。这么多年国内的传统教育,一直追求被老
师,父母,和社会定义的所谓的优秀,也就是好成绩,好学校,大公司,出国留学。
当年铁定了一条心学国际金融,因为它最热,出路好。出国后学习转专业,学习信
息工程,也是因为它最热,出路好。看着进了华尔街的师兄师姐,敬仰的不得了,
也没太搞清楚他们到底在干什么,但觉着那就是我的人生理想。在学校奋斗了二十
年,不如愿的去了软件公司,一切只是为了生存。看着我的朋友,没有在乎过北京
户口,美国绿卡,工资洋房,没有在乎过别人怎样看他们,锲尔不舍,在很多领域
都很成功。别的人可能只看见他们成功了,可是作为朋友,我深深的理解他们所经
历的挫折,承担的风险,和不懈的毅力。想借这个机会把一些想法整理一下。希望感兴趣的朋友一起参与讨论。

一: 你如何看自己?(How do you perceive yourself?)

很多时候,我们会抱怨因为种种原因我们没能过上自己想过得生活。经常羡慕别人
的成功,想不明白自己道路如何选择。让我们做一个练习:给自己几分钟,想想以
下的两个问题,拿出一张纸,写下你的答案。请不要跳过去,思考的过程是最有帮
助的。

1。假设钱不是你的问题,而且你做任何事情都没有可能失败,请写下在你的一生几
十年里想做的事情。用你最大限度的想象力,写下来你可能想都不敢想的答案。

2。假设你最终有机会去参加自己的葬礼,你的亲人,朋友,同事,生前所参与的社
团都来参加葬礼。你有机会听到每一个人对你的最后致词,你想听到什么,希望每
一个人说什么 (第二个问题来自steven Covey)

我第一次做这样的练习实在一个朋友Terry的家里。他是一个personal coach。我绞
尽脑汁,满脑子装满了从小教育的结果。我写下了 - 成功的职业,赚很多钱,周游
世界,有一个幸福的家庭。Terry让我大胆的想,想那些潜意识里觉着不可能的事。
说实话,我的理想就这么多,想不出别的。即使这点理想,都不知如何达到。

我的眼界是有限的。如果我看不到山顶,就永远也不会达到那里。很多时候,我们
想的问题是:下一年我的工资会长多少;下一次升职会是什么时候;我什么时候把
自己的技术练的更强,以寻找到更好的职位;别人都有绿卡公民,我得等到什么时
候。。。这时别人的理想变成了我们的理想,我们锲尔不舍的追求社会和他人所定
义的优秀。即使达到了,又会患得患失,看看周围的人,想着自己原本应该追求另
外一种理想。这可能是为什么国内工作时,羡慕出国留学的同学,在国外求学等绿
卡,又羡慕回国创业的人。

打个比方,把人生看作是一个旅途 - 我们拿着地图找芝加哥。看着地图,我们一目
了然,都知道要找最近的路。可是如果我们根本不知道芝加哥在哪,我们往哪走?
我们打听了很多人,有人说在东边好,东边有芝加哥,有人说西边有芝加哥。我们
一会往东,一回往西,一头雾水,却没问几个为什么,还有什么办法能帮我们找到
目的地。也许这样的随机行走(Random Walk) 把我们带到一个美丽的地方,我们又决
定不去芝加哥了。我们也许在地图上找到芝加哥了,可是道路艰险,路边的风景又
很美,我们决定先享受能得到的,想想再说。

最后有几个人完成了这个旅途呢?我们不知道。我想问题的根源是我们还不清楚到
底要做什么。是的,很少有人能够生来就站在巨人的肩膀上看人生。不断的寻找人
生的方向是需要巨大的勇气和毅力的。先别抱怨,使劲想想自己到底想有一个什么
样的人生,在一个理想的世界里,你会要什么。在死的那一天,我们希望自己的孩
子,爱人,朋友如何看待自己。这可能不是一天两天的工作,哪怕花了几年能想明
白一些问题,都是值得的。

最近我的一个女朋友来 Wharton读书,有机会和她续续旧,谈谈近况。她学的是金
融,最终在北京开了一个医疗器械公司。她毕业后在一个国有国际贸易公司工作,
经常出国,旱涝保收。她不喜欢没有挑战的生活,跳到了投资银行。每天苦学,苦
干,颇有成就,但觉着不是自己最终想追求的生活。很多日子里她就是在想,想,
想自己到底喜欢做什么。“创业”的概念越来越清晰,只是极没可能,象一个遥远
的梦。但是她的愿望相当强烈,便开始不断的寻找各种机会。他后来的老公,当时
的同事说,她那时一天天神神叨叨,不知道在忙什么。在她从国有贸易公司辞职的
那一天,家里人就反对,希望一个女孩有份稳定的工作和家庭。她读各种书,跟各
种人谈,寻找方向和机会。在她的心里上完全做好准备后,一个小机会给了她灵感,
她开始找人一起研制一种低成本医疗器械。她的决心和准备终于得到了家里人的精神支持。产品成功的那一天,她辞职了,开始了她全职的,漫长的寻找投资的道路,没
有任何收入,没有什么前景。投资人说她太年轻,她去买框架眼睛,老式西装。投
资人想把她甩开,模仿她的产品;投资人嫌她没有经验,公司没有前途。一个又一
个,半年过去了,没有人愿意投资。她的一句名言是:每当你觉着自己就要不行的
时候,再挺一挺,就在最后的时候,总会有希望。终于,她找到了投资,产品很长
时间不盈利,她和合伙人想了很多办法,又挺过来了。公司已经步入正规。

她在实践中寻找着自己的理想。其实她的理想没有结束。她从来没停止思考。她说,
最初就是要挣钱。现在她想发展对社会有价值的环保产品。她看到了中国年轻企业
家难找资金,投资者苦于没有好项目的现状,她想做一家风险投资公司,帮助私有
企业发展。这个梦想把她带到了Wharton。我想她和很多Wharton同学不同只出是:
她有一个很强烈的愿望,一个很执着的梦;她已经在把握自己的人生,而不是为了
去高薪的投资银行或者是资讯公司而苦恼。

举了一个很长的例子是说,寻找人生方向是很难的一件事。因为她是我的朋友,我
可以清清楚楚的看见,为什么当年的小丫头会成为今天的企业家,不是她的资智,
不是她的关系,而是她真的寻找了,真的动手去做了。当我们读很多成功人的故事,
都惊叹他们的领导能力,交流能力,他们的眼光和魄力。其实他们的成功和能力,
都是不断失败,探索的结果。他们真正的特殊的才能是 -- 行动与坚持。

不是每个人都要成为企业家,都要“出人头地”。一个好母亲,好妻子也是一种人
生理想。只是在抱怨之前想一想,我们是不是真的知道自己想要什么。有的人愿意
享受澳大利亚的田园风光,家庭的天伦只乐,如果你不愿意,你想好了自己想要什
么?如果简单的工作不愿意干,复杂的工作又不愿意扎扎实实学习专业知识,管理
技巧,或者是营销技能,问问自己愿意吃苦做什么?如果别的人的理想成为你前行
的航标,你就会觉得人生充满遗憾,因为无论朝哪个方向走,你都会留恋别人路上
的风景,东南西北不断的追随别人,到头来还在自己的港湾打转。

“Do you want to become a wandering generality or a meaningful specific?"
我们的路只有靠自己才能走好。

未完待续
二:寻找方向和理想更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
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  • [ZT] My job hunting story - 1 By hotdog
    本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛1 Introduction
    My job hunting experiences were dramatic. During the period September 2001 to November 2002, I got 7 job offers, worked in 4 companies, and got laid off once. Even today, those days and nights are still clearly in my mind. Hardship made me grow; and determination made me succeed. I want to share my stories, because I believe these stories happen every day on my fellow Chinese.

    During my fighting with the tough job market, I learned so many things beyond job hunting and interviews. What have I learned?

     Do things with a purpose and direction. A lot of our fellow Chinese came to the United States without a clear purpose. I was one of them. I came to the United States because of good opportunities and high living standards. I studied information technology (“IT”) because it was hot, just as I chose Finance when I was in China. I accepted an offer from a high-tech company although I didn’t like it, because I wanted to play safe under the tough job market. Today, when I looked back, I realize I never really followed my own direction because I did not have one. For my entire life, I have been pursing the society-defined “excellence” and following other people’s dreams. My friends, who are the smartest science guys, spent 10 years in two Ph.D. programs. If we have a wrong map, no matter how hard we are working toward our goals, we will not get there. The tough part is that nobody can really help us define the “map”; we are the masters and we have to get ready before we hit the road.
     Follow your interest and your dream. The one sentence I always said during my laid-off job hunting was, “God, if you gave me the job of my next interview, you will save my entire life. I will worship you.” If we ever think the ultimate goal it to get a job, we are wrong. The ultimate goal for everybody is to live a happy and meaningful life. Don’t just get any job because you had a lot of pressure. Don’t choose popular majors just because it is easy to get a job. Don’t give up what you really like just because it does not bring in a lot of money. If you do know what you really like, you are blessed; for a long time, I did not know what I really like. One of my good friends, however, did know what she wants in life. She was persistent with her dream even the dream was seemingly impossible, especially for a foreigner. After 3 years graduate school and 2 years experiences at a local newspaper in North Dakota, she got her dream job as a reporter in the Associated Press. I know it is just a start for her dream; she is one the way toward her end goal. In the meantime, her fellow classmates transferred the popular majors and were going farther away from their dreams.
     Communication is the key to have a successful career and life. Communication, communication, and communication. I cannot emphasize more the importance of communication. During the first several months, I suffered and I could not land any on-site interviews because of my poor “interview English”. Interviews themselves are a marketing and sales process. We have to understand our counterparties and ourselves in order to seize the opportunities and lead the interviews. Beyond interviews, communication is probably playing the key role in our every life. The people who are the masters of communication are today’s pacemakers.

    There are always a lot of lessons to learn when we face hardships. This article will more focus on the techniques of interviews.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
    • [ZT] My job hunting story - 2 By hotdog
      本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛2 September 2001 and IT

      I chose to study IT in 2001 after I got my first master in Economics, because I strongly believed the combination of Finance and IT would bring me to the Wall Street. Wall Street was my dream for my entire college life. I was shocked when I heard the news on September 11, but did not realize that it would have such a big impact on my personal life.

      The one-year program was tough, especially for me from a Finance background. I was scheduled to take fifteen courses a year and work on two teaching assistant jobs per semester. The annual job fair was scheduled in October. Most of the banks on the Wall Street canceled their on-campus interviews. Instead, we found a box on their booths, reading “Sorry we can not come to the on-campus interviews. Please place your resume in the box.” People threw their resumes in the box, without hoping for anything. My dream to work on the Wall Street became dim….
      3 To Fight or To Die
      3.1 Pre-Selection for On-Campus Interview
      For students on the campus, the single most important way to look for jobs is the on-campus interview sponsored by the career services center. That year, it was very difficult to get pre-selected for on-campus interviews, because so many people were competing for limited number of openings. Our program had almost 120 students and it was full of depressing atmosphere in the building. I don’t have to describe the tough situation. If you have experienced job hunting, you know it.

      Just one year ago in 2000, candidates would land 1 interview every day during the busy season. I was determined to have at least one interview per week. I pretty much hit my goal. The tricks to get more pre-selections include:

      1. Be very aggressive in the job fair. For those who are afraid of English public speaking, this might be a tough job. But in order to land a job, we have to overcome this obstacle. The earlier you get over it, the sooner you will land a job.
      a. Research the companies that will come to the job fair, understand their business and the kind of people they are looking for, circle down the companies you are really interested in;
      b. Prepare 60 seconds self introduction (concise and right-to-the-point);
      c. If you realize that a position is a good fit for you, seize opportunity to sell yourself. Ask “could you please give me more information about the position” or “could you please let me know what kind of person you are looking for?” After their introduction, you could say, “I am exactly the type of person you are looking for. My training in … helped me build strong skills in… My project (working) experiences in … prepared me for…” Remember: be enthusiastic and be brave!
      d. Ask for the business cards from the person and try to get more information regarding their rights in hiring. Keep the cards and follow up with emails or mails.
      2. Tailor each resume according to the requirement of each job. I found this very effective. I especially paid attention to the skills required (the “key words”), and put as many key words as possible in the resume. Our campus job system allows each person to upload 10 resumes. Most of the people I know only uploaded 2 or 3. I had 2 at that time: one for IT, and one for IT and Finance combination. One day, my Indian friend showed me his 10 resumes. He told me he always had 10 for different positions and for different companies. It worked. He got interviews from all the major IT companies. Amazingly enough, he got almost all the interviews from the limited number of banks who offered on-campus interviews, even though he knew nothing about finance. I admit that his strong communication skills (he spoke with strong accent) contributed to his success, but without his efforts, so many interviews were just missions impossible.
      3. Go to the information session and career center for the open slots for the interviews you are really interested in. How ironically that not a lot of people are doing that. I got three interviews with this technique for which I was not originally pre-selected, which led to three on-site interviews, and two internship positions. The two companies are Goldman Sachs in New York (I actually got three position in three different groups; they asked me to choose one among the three.) and Citadel Investment in Chicago.
      4. Do not give up each opportunity, even though you think it is not possible. If you try it, you lose nothing; but if you don’t try, you lose the world.
      3.2 Prepare for Interviews
      After I started working at my current company, I got the opportunity to interview many candidates. Once the candidates pass the basic technical requirements, we would look at their personality and communication skills. The question we always asked was, “will the guy/girl be very nice to work with.” It took me a long time to understand this when I was doing my job hunting.

      My first interview was in mid October with an equity firm, I failed. I failed all of my interviews for the fall semester. During those three months, I had interviews with Morgan Stanley, Salomon Smith Barney, Black Rock, The Hull Group, First Credit Suisse Boston, and Convergys (I could not remember those small firms that interviewed me.) I went back home in China during winter vacation hoping the Hull group will give a surprise. They gave me a NO on the day I returned to the United States. The semester was tough to me. I was glad I could go through it.

      My disadvantages in job interviews include two aspects. 1) communication kills. One day, I had mock interviews with my Indian friend. He asked me some basic questions. I was so embarrassed. I sort of knew the answers, but really did not know how to answer them nicely. 2) not enough technical IT knowledge. I was never an IT person. I started my program in May and hardly learned enough for the interviews, but I had to get ready for the fall job fair.

      Some of the stories during my interviews in the first semester:
      ? Interview with Morgan Stanly. “Humiliated” is the word I want to use. It was in October 2001. In order to impress the interviewers, I prepared PowerPoint presentation of all the projects I worked on. I drew graphs explaining the background and technology employed in those projects. The Vice President first asked me several basic questions, and then he turned to the projects I worked on. He asked me some details regarding the implementation, I was so nervous that I could not remember what it was. My heart was pounding and racing. He asked, “did you work on the projects by yourself?” I replied, “yes. But I am so nervous….@#&%” Thirty minutes later, I fled from the interview room. I cried; I could not help it. I know the opportunity with Morgan Stanley was gone.

      Lessen: know you stuff. Every line on your resume could be a story. If you could not explain something, it means you are not technically strong or you are not honest.

      ? Interview with Salomon Smith Barney (SSB). It was with the capital markets group – my dream job. The interview went well (I thought, because nothing went wrong). I was waiting for the feedback. My Indian friend also participated the interview. He told me that he got the notice for on-site interview the second day after the on-campus one. He was from a chemical engineering major, which has nothing to do with finance. I have so many years’ experiences in finance. What went wrong? When he was packing for the on-site interview, I got an email from the human resource representative at SSB. I got rejected. As always, the reason for rejection was that they had found better candidates. I was so confused and I could not help calling the vice president who interviewed me. He said, “you are definitely a strong candidate, but you might not have strong computer programming skills as required. We need people to do some computer modeling work.” I was so emotional. I told him, “I have very strong skills in programming. I used to develop financial models overcoming the deficiencies of the Black-Sholes model using C++, MATLAB, Guass…….” He was probably convinced and told me he would discuss with the HR people. I sent him a follow-up email, with a copy of the abstract of my master thesis in financial modeling. Several days later, I got rejected again. I doubted whether he ever discussed with HR people, because if he made a decision to bring me back, it means he made a mistake of not brining me in the first time.

      Lesson: I did not truly understand what he was looking for, so I was not able to sell my skills within the 30 minutes interview.

      ? Interview with Black Rock. First of all, I really liked that position. The interviewer asked me why I was interested in Black Rock. I had my one-minute introduction. I mentioned I had strong skills in IT, good personality, and strong interest in IT type of jobs in the banking environment. Then he said, “well, I am a VP in the marketing and accounting department. I can refer you to the IT department.” Oh, my God. I wanted to cry, but I did not have tears. Apparently, I did not get the second round. I was too eager to sell myself and express my interest, but it was the wrong target.

      Lessen: If you are not sure what kind of persons they are looking for, ask them. The question I always ask is “could you please tell me what kind of people are you looking for?” After they answered, I would say, “I am exactly the type of person.” Then I would sell myself from three perspectives: technical, personality, strong enthusiasm toward the company and industry and even the group.”

      ? Interviews with the Hull Group. As time went on, my interview skills increased a lot, as well as my technical skills. The Hull Group was also my dream job. It is an equity-trading firm based in Chicago and became a subsidiary of Goldman Sachs in late 1990s. I had two round on-campus interviews with two different groups. The equity-trading group selected me for the on-site interview. I was so scared; it was my first on-site interview and it was already December 2001. Due to some miscommunication with the HR people, my interview was postponed. One day The Hull Group gave me a phone call, telling me that they had to give me another round of phone interview before they could bring me in for the on-site interview. We did it. It was not bad, although I was scared to death, as always. A lot of technical and behavior questions.

      The on-site interview started at 9:00 am and finished at 6:00 pm with a one-hour lunch. I met almost 10 people in the morning. They threw all kinds of questions to me – technical, personal, case study, and anything they could think of. In the afternoon, they wanted to test my C++ programming skills. Tell you the truth, I never took a course in C++; I studied chapters in “How to programming in C++” before I came to the interview. Thank God, all the questions were multiple choices, so at least I could guess. It took me almost 2 hours in the exam. I guess I did well, because I got to meet the head of the group after all the scheduled interviews. The guy looked very nice. He said I did very well. He asked me several simple questions such as “what is the most unforgettable experience in the United States?”, “how do you like the job?” I answered and I thought I did well. Several days later, I got a call from the Hull Group telling me that they could not decided and had to give me a phone interview again. “My God.” I though, “Just tell me, yes or not – why are you torturing me?” Several days later, I had a phone interview with four people from the group – all scenario questions. I waited for a long time for the final decision. It was a “NO.”

      Later in the spring semester, the head came to the campus for summer intern interviews. I waited for almost an hour to get the chance to talk with him. He still remembered me. He told me, “The job market is really tough. It if were last year, we would definitely give you the offer. A lot of people want to go to New York, so they reject the offers from our group, but this year, none of them. You did very well, but you had to be yourself. From your answers, I could no tell what kind of person you are. You gave me the impression of memorizing what you have prepared.” At that time, I was already an expert in interviews. I talked with him and he agreed to give me a chance to interview with the technology group at Goldman in New York. It was already March 2002. I did very well in the interview and got the internship opportunities from three groups within Goldman.

      Lessen: Be yourself. Never neglect the important the behavior questions! They could kill you just because simple questions like “what was the most unforgettable experience.”

      ? Indian friends taught me how to stand out during interviews. I have to tell you that this Indian guy is very smart. Although a lot of Chinese classmates did not like him, he was one of the strongest. He knew a lot of tricks on how to draw people’s attention and how to lead an interview. He said before each interview, he would search the Internet for latest news related to that company. He succeeded the on-campus interview with Citi Group because he asked questions that distinguished him from other candidates. (Isn’t it amazing that he knew nothing about Finance, but always got pre-selection, and always got on-site interviews?) He asked the woman who interviewed him, “I got to know that there was a big merger and acquisition between Company A and Group B in your company, which has a big impact in the … market. Could you please give some comments…?” The woman said, “wow, I even do not know that, so I can not give any comments. I need to go back and check. But this is very good.” He got the on-site interview, but another classmate from Singapore who had three years’ experiences in banking industry did not. I once had an interview at a big consulting firm. I was scheduled to meet 15 people the whole day. After the morning session, I felt that they had a lot of concerns about my writing and communication skills. In the afternoon, my first interview with the partner went well. I mentioned an articled he published on the company’s website and showed strong interests. He smiled and gave me some comments. As always, I asked him what kind of people they were looking for. He smiled and said, “we are looking for people just like yourself who are smart, intelligent, and enthusiastic.” I think it is probably because of him that the company did not kill me in the first round.

      Lessen: Small things make you stand out among candidates. Small conversations with key people make a lot of difference. Talk with people who are experts in interviews and learn from them. Don’t complain or just simply admire other people. Try to understand what the hell makes difference between you and them. If it is communication, learn English; if it is technical, do your homework. Remember, we are smart Chinese.

      There are so many stories I could share. Most important things: to be proactive, be enthusiastic, be technically strong, and to make sure they like you when you answer behavior questions. At the end of the semester, although I did not land any jobs, I already prepared almost 20 pages of interview questions. I wrote the answers to each question, rewrote them for each interview. I started to understand what my Indian friends meant when he said, “you have to learn how to lead the interviewer.” It is an art. If you can master the art of interviews, you will land any jobs.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
    • [ZT] My job hunting story - 3, 4 By hotdog
      本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛3.3 Land a Job
      Finally, I got a job from a Silicon Valley high-tech company (“SV”). It was a hard process. The on-campus interview was such a failure, but I got the on-site because I won behavior interviews. I know it.

      It was the spring semester of 2002. With the pressure of visa status, I did not have any choices, but to land a job. I did not limit my job-hunting to banks; I started to look for technology jobs. I prepared my resume exactly as what was required in SV’s job posting. Surprisingly, I got the on-campus interview. The technical part was a disaster. I could not write quickly how to delete a note in a link-list, the basic stuff in data structure. The interviewer gave me a lot of guidance and I finally got it. I was scared, because I sensed that I would fail again.

      Next he asked me a behavior question, “what is your favorite project?”
      My answer (I don’t remember it clearly): I have to say my favorite project is ABC. First, it involved learning and applying the state-of-art technology such as A, B, and C. I got the opportunity to learn a lot of new things within a very short period of time in order to meet the deadline. I felt excited because I am willing to learn news things all the time. Second, it was a real world project for a client XYZ, which required a lot of project management and client interaction. We followed the project plan and milestones, practice timely communication with the client to develop specification and collect feedback. I got the opportunities to develop strong communication and project management skills. Third, I had the opportunity to work with a strong team. We helped each other to meet each milestone and learned a lot from each other...”

      In this small question, I presented to him something very important in a candidate: 1) the strong interest to learn new technology; 2) good communication and people skills; and 3) a strong team player (remember you always have to work in a team environment in a corporation).

      Believe it or not, I got the on-site interview, which I did not expect. I was actually very depressed, because I did not do well in technical questions.

      Before I talked about my on-site interview, I wanted to tell you another story. My Indian friend went to on-site interview with the same company during the fall semester 2001. I told you earlier that he had a chemical engineering bachelor degree and one year experience in IT. The interviewer asked him, “Do you see the guy (who is also an Indian.) who just left? I will not recruit him. First, he does not have a computer science background. Second, he never took Data Structure. You two have similar backgrounds. Why should I hire you?” My friend seemed a bit emotional; he said, “I gradated from the best university in India – IIT. The competition was intensive and the students who stand out are the best in India and all have strong learning ability. After I graduated from school, I got a job in the United States as a software engineer where I proved myself again as a quick learner with strong performance. I got straight A+ in all my course work so far. I never knew before what is distributed technology, J2EE, and so many other technology, but I am the best in the class. Whenever I have a strong focus, I am able to grasp the concept and technology very quickly and excel in the group. I believe I will have no problem to understand Data Structure within one-month.” After several questions, the interviewer apparently liked him, but told him, “I will give you the on-site interview, but remember those who will interview you on-site are not business people. You have to know all the technical questions they asked.”

      See, how important behavior questions are. It could save you from your bad performance on technical questions.

      There was about one-month before the on-site interview. I was working crazy to prepare the interview. It might be my last chance. I know it is a very technical position. One month later, I could say, I knew everything. I might even be able to get a job at Microsoft. I studied so hard. I knew all the C++ and IT questions from the Internet, and I studied Data Structure systematically one more time. The night before the interview was a nightmare; I could not fall asleep until 4:00 am. Anyway, I did it. I answered most of the tough technical questions and I did very well in behavior questions. I conveyed strongly the message that I am a strong team player, I have strong personal skills, and I would always put the company and the client in the first place.

      4 Lay-Off
      Seven days after I started working in the company, I got laid off, together with almost all the other new hires from the top computer science schools in the United States. The rumor of laying-off was spread during the first week, but nobody expected that new hires would get laid-off. I tried not to cry when my manager notified me about the laif-off in his office. It was hard. My roommate and I spent a month buying furniture and getting settled down, and we got laid-off within one-week. My feeling toward California was a mix. I like the place, but I hate the company.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
    • [ZT] My job hunting story - 5 By hotdog
      5 Job Hunting Again
      No other choices – to die or to land a job. It was July 2002; the job market was still bad. I had one year before my EAD card expired. This job-hunting after the laid-off was different from the on-campus one. I had to use media such as monster.com, because I was no more a student of the university. Between July and November 2002 before I finally settled down in a job I liked, I worked in three companies and never wasted a single day. I feel that I almost became a master of interviews. I posted my resumes on all the possible on-line job searching websites, monitor my “hit” counts, and renew my resumes every day. If nobody hit my resume, that means I had to revise them. By the way, I gave myself two English names for two different types of jobs. If the headhunter called me A, I knew it was IT job; if they called me B, I knew it was a finance or combination job. There are some interesting stories.
    • [ZT] 工作中的七年之痒
      本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛工作中的七年之痒
      ---------------------------------

      有人说在职场中也有类似婚姻中的“七年之痒”。慢慢的热情就没有了,工作越来越
      像鸡肋 - 食之无味,弃之可惜。平淡的工作象平淡的婚姻一样,很多时候都是态度
      和习惯导致的结果。

      1. 活着的永动机

      这两天,闲来无事,整理计算机上的文件,发现了很多老文件。这些files里分门别
      类的记录着各种各样的学习资料。有一个file里记满了刚加入公司那段时间在工作
      中学到的新的词和短语用法。比如说:"I am really swamped(*) today and will call
      you sometime tomorrow。" 看着厚厚的十几页纸,我不禁感慨万千。 刚进公司时
      说话,写作都不行,心里说不出的滋味。那时,每天都有强烈的学习愿望。每天把
      别人写的email,说的话记下来,学习商业用语;那时经常拿着一大摞报告回家,学
      习商业写作和分析。我的学物理的室友开玩笑说,“谁说世界上没有永动机,你就
      是一个活着的永动机呀。生命不息,学习不止。”搞的我们哈哈大笑。

      后来不知什么时候,我觉着自己适应了,得到表扬了,慢慢的就不再利用业余时间
      看和工作有关的材料。觉着工资就发那么一点点,还要用业余时间,不干了。

      2. 我的三年之痒

      再后来,开始抱怨工作一成不变,每天重复同样的东西,担当的职责不够多,升职
      论资排辈。开始东想西想,是不是要换个行业,换份工作;以自己的背景,呆在这
      里大材小用。

      最近一次面试经历让我更是迷惑。我被以前的一个同事推荐去他们公司(也是四大)面
      试,我只是想认识一下同行业的人,多了解一下情况。第一个合伙人就给我一个下
      马威。他说:“告诉我你为什么要到我们公司?告诉你我们公司和你们公司没有任
      何区别。”“这个行业已经很成熟,很多工作越来越商品化(commoditized)。你既
      不是博士毕业,又没有法律学位,你成为合伙人的概率几乎是0。” (可能还没好
      意思提我是外国人。) 老头语重心长地说,“以你的背景,你为什么不去金融业,去
      一个面更广的行业呢?十年以后,如果AA(指我做的行业)没有了,你怎么办呢?”
      “看了你的简历,我觉着 - you are not a good fit。”

      Faint... 后来的一个合伙人感受是:做了15年,做什么也会很枯燥了。问了一下他
      对职业发展的想法,老先生说,现在大公司内部也开始in-house做我们这块业务,
      高层管理一年也能拿到$200K左右。要是10年前有这机会,他早就不在这了。Faint...

      总而言之,这次面试加重了我的困惑。 不管是考验还是真话,我觉着所说的还是有
      一定道理的。

      3. 那么怎么办呢?

      想了很久,觉得换工作不是解决问题的办法。以前失业时,拿到了四大的工作,不也
      是激动的找不到北。再另人激动的工作,本质上都是一样的。很多时候不是工作造
      就了人,而是人define了自己的career。老公说的有道理:你的问题不是换不换工
      作,而是如何扩展你的career。一个人可以把事情越做越大,也可以越做越窄。

      举身边的两个例子。一个台湾裔美国人,毕业就做AA(指我做的行业),后来又读MBA,
      毕业后一心要做I-banking,并开始在Goldman实习。由于种种原因,又放弃I-banking,
      回来做他的小manager。后来芬兰office需要人,他就去芬兰帮着做项目。结果三年
      就做了合伙人。AA在芬兰没有前途,因为政府没有regulations。他就找准机会,开
      始涉足M&A services,把AA变成M&A services的一部分。他的客户关系多了,竟然
      以五个人的小组吞并了十几个人的Transactions Services (part of their business
      is M&A services) 组,成为芬兰FAS (Financial Advisory Services) 的lead partner。
      推算一下,成为合伙人时他可能才29,30岁。这斯说后来猎头公司找他,职位是著
      名投行的M&A managing director 一职。32岁时又开始了下一个挑战,去中国做AA的
      lead partner。AA这块业务,我们在中国只有5%的市场份额。

      分析一下他和我老板的区别:观念和魄力。我曾经问我老板他是如何做marketing的。
      他说,我们不用自己做市场,我们组主要靠federal 和 international tax 来 refer
      项目。他的这番话让我很惊讶。客户关系应是他生存的根本,把生存权都放在别人
      手里,自然是当不了合伙人。上面提到的台湾美国人,在芬兰举办了一个conference,
      把大名鼎鼎的Michael Porter (如果没听说过,可以google一下这人) 请来。当然,
      他能把 Porter 请来,也是很多年积累的结果,决不是一件易事。Porter 要来,很
      多CEO,CFO就报名参加他的conference。结果一天下来,会议收入比AA小组一个季
      度的项目收入都多。更重要的是,他建立了客户关系,为他做M&A services 打开了
      局面。

      以前我和AA的Global Leader在一个office。这人以前是工程师。八,九年前MBA毕
      业后开始在我们这干。他实在是干到头了 - Global Leader。最近一个惊人的举动
      是辞职,做一个从S&P分出来的公司的AA组的头,帮他们开展业务,就等着公司成功
      上市,身价成几何级数增长。原来我们这么无聊的业务,都可以跟股票上市,创业
      联系上。路,都是人自己走的。

      试探了一下我老板会不会跟他走。我老板说不看好Global Leader 的选择,因为我
      们做的是国际业务,没有其它国家的支持和税务组的支持,业务很难开展。我想,
      这可能就是他们之间的区别吧:一个给自己创造出道路;一个守着原有的规则,玩
      一成不变的游戏。

      相信这些人走到今天也不是一蹴而就。道路中的挫折,困惑也不会少。不过抱怨是
      没用的,聪明的人在别人抱怨时已经开始独辟蹊径,深谋远虑了。

      4. 下一步如何做呢?

      我认为有三点很重要的素质 (想起来别的在补充)。

      1) 不能放弃学习知识的热情,不局限在日常工作范围内。想想以前的学习劲头,挺
      令人感动的。不过以前学的都是显而易见的东西,比如说,说和写,专业分析,并
      且局限在staff水平上。把自己换位成一个AA领域的expert,现有的水平能行吗?不
      够。现在就管理项目和客户关系,行吗?还差点。那为什么每天抱怨没机会学新东
      西呢,抱怨工作无聊呢?

      我从认识的朋友中发现,按比例,女的更容易做事局限在眼前,容易抱怨,经常容
      易为眼前的挫折沮丧。我的一个大学同学(男的),刚进公司时是junior analyst,
      薪水大概5,6万。不到四年,他已经做到了vice president (中间有很多级, - senior
      analyst, director, assistant vice president),薪水和奖金大概也涨到了15,
      16万。公司的平均工资涨幅是每年5%,amazing!他这人做事非常可靠,专业水
      平很强,更重要的是善于人际交往,深得老板的赏识。

      我们另外一个同学和他做同样的工作。她非常上进,想把事情做好。可是经常发火,
      觉着做的事情都是简单,无聊,重复,每天上班越来越成为一种负担和糊口的手段。
      她说,很多事情她不明白,别人花几分钟给她讲讲,就可以了。可是,没人给她讲,
      每天就是做无聊的事情。

      相信那个男同学是从这条路上走过来的。很多事情都是自己硬着头皮,琢磨出来的。
      同样的事情,他会想办法改进,会夜里读文件到1,2点钟。他以前举了一个很小的
      例子,刚进公司时,工作是写SAS程序,run已有的模型。很多工作都要手工做。几
      年了,组里的人,包括Ph.D.,一直这么做。他就把整个process写程序给automate了。
      事情虽小,可是让人很impressive。

      人们经常说:“leadership is a choice, but not a position。” 有道理呀。一
      个人可以被委任予responsibility,更可以自己选择responsibility,选择自己的
      position。当然,这种选择得和能力水平想匹配,这也就是为什么要不断的学习,
      积累,并且放宽眼界。不断积累的知识,开阔的视野是自己去选择道路的基础。

      “Be proactive. Take more effort. Take leading roles in certain areas.
      Expand our knowledge horizon."

      2) 做事要有坚韧的毅力,要学会忍耐,善于思考。人这一辈子,总会遇到不公平的
      待遇。可能是工资低了,可能是怀才不遇了,可能老板太坏。有的人会一点点改变
      局面,让自己的才能显露出来;有的人会赌气撂挑子不干或走人。“是金子总会发
      光的。”

      上面的提到的朋友第一年下来,辛辛苦苦,大老板只给涨了几千块钱工资。简直是
      不可思议。再后来的三年,career火箭式上升。

      我的一个朋友因为年终老板(据说是个啥都不懂,又压制别人的经理) 给得评语不是
      自己期望的,因为自己拿到绿卡不再有求于公司,就和老板闹翻了,一气之下走了。
      现在多少有点后悔当时的冲动。我在想如果是我会怎样,如果是我上面的提到的朋
      友又会怎样。同样一件事出来,每个人会把它shape成不同形状,得到完全不同的结
      果。

      我工作的第二年,performance指标是 region 所有office最高的。前几天才知道,
      那一年,我的工资涨了10%,可是同组的一个女孩涨了25%,其它的人也比我高很多。
      而且发现连着三年,她每次都是15% 以上。我心里气得不得了,恨恨地想着下次可
      能得拿着别的offer来威胁公司。如果我来一个换位思考会怎样,我刚进公司时因为
      是硕士学位(而且还有两个),比她工资高2,3万。论学位,是比她高;可是干的活,
      做的贡献,凭心而论她比我强。她做事情极其有责任心,把每一个项目都当成自己
      SAT考试那样去做,文章写的好,而且钻研问题的能力也很强。虽然是第二年staff,
      我觉着她比一些熬年头上去的manager都强。她这人很bitchy (她用这词形容另外一
      个同事,我觉着她俩挺象。),但是很能干,很认真。事情交给她,你就放心吧。还
      是第三年staff时,她就掌握了美国最大电信公司的客户资源,并且成为IP转移这一
      大类项目的expert。当然,代价是有的,这个项目的高级经理半路离开公司,按常
      规是要再派其它经理。不过其它人谁也取代不了她的重要性,因为只有她知道项目
      的每一个细节。她就跟着合伙人,没日没夜的把上百万的项目给做下来了。中间GMAT也
      没考好。虽然她只是senior associate,可是实际上在承担一个manager,或者是senior
      manager的职责。她的辛苦和努力,自然会有回报。如果你问她,想不想长期做AA业
      务,她会斩钉截铁的说,“No。”那为什么她工作要这么刻苦,尽职尽责。我想这
      是她的习惯 - 把事情做的尽善尽美。成功是一种习惯。

      想想自己,在工作中经常有懒惰情绪,觉着事情有别人罩着,我把自己份内的事情
      做完,就行了,多花时间在工作上,总觉得吃亏了,又没给我什么好处。成功是一
      种态度。

      老公经常说,最怕一进公司就把自己当棵葱。以为自己是什么硕士,博士,就一定
      比别人强,要做比别人高级的活。Stay humble, stay hungry。另一方面心底里要
      aiming high,有vision,有耐心,,是Ph.D.就真正发挥出Ph.D.的作用。。

      以前我有一个可能是错误的观念,认为"climbing corporate ladder"是一件浪费生
      命的事情,极其无聊的事情。而个人创业,才是真正的价值实现。其实,无论给人
      打工,还是自己创业,很多习惯,态度,和素质,都是一样的。只有自己才能打开
      封锁自己思想的枷锁。记得一年前,给在Oracle的印度同学(在找工作的文章中提到
      他)发email,问他近况如何。他说已经从database组转到product development/ marketing,
      正在实现他的几个新产品的设想。我说,“感到climbing corporate ladder很无聊,
      呆在公司里浪费生命。”他说:“我不这么认为。在公司里面还是有机会创新和发
      展的。如果自己的公司不鼓励创新,应该找一家有利于发展和创新的公司。”明白
      了,问题还是在人身上。如果我去了Oracle,估计每天痛苦挣扎,程序不愿意编,
      创新就更无处可谈。所以,很多的问题都是和个人相关的。前两天,看见网上争吵
      到底学会计的有没有前途。这争吵没什么意义,会计师和会计师的前途可以千差万
      别。别人的路是很难照葫芦画瓢地走的,没有自己思考过,尝试过,就永远也不知
      道其中的滋味和奥妙。

      3) 良好的人际交往能力,语言表达能力。这事挺难,另外大家常说的一句话是
      “尤其是用英语,在一个不同的文化中,太难。” 反正这是个大坎,不过也得过。
      所以别无选择,拿出当年考G的决心。前年这时候去滑雪,摔得屁滚尿流,好羡慕,
      好羡慕得心应手的人。今年又去滑雪,忽然悟出来了,能自如的转弯,减速。和人
      打交道,也有一个过程,从羡慕别人到顿悟,需要不断的琢磨和体会。这个方面想
      法和体会还不够成熟,而且提高人际交往水平是个大课题。以后一边体会,一边补充。

      总而言之,first thing first. The first thing is to work on myself.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
    • [ZT]为什么会前途茫茫,两手空空
      本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛为什么会前途茫茫,两手空空
      -- 前途在哪里?

      看了"我的问题在哪里?"朋友的帖子,我感受颇深。在现实中这位朋友的困惑不仅
      仅只是她一个人的困惑,而是我们很多人的经历。 我的很多朋友都很优秀,无论是
      在中国还是美国,一路上顺利的从名牌学校出来,进名牌公司或者国家部委,考T考
      G出国留学,拿高薪住大房子。可是很多人在工作了一段时间以后,却困惑的很,忽
      然不知道自己想要什么,每每说起来工作就是:“I am sick and tired of what
      I am doing。”但是日子还是一天天过下去,我们也一天天在变老。

      看看我自己,在这样的困惑中挣扎很久。这么多年国内的传统教育,一直追求被老
      师,父母,和社会定义的所谓的优秀,也就是好成绩,好学校,大公司,出国留学。
      当年铁定了一条心学国际金融,因为它最热,出路好。出国后学习转专业,学习信
      息工程,也是因为它最热,出路好。看着进了华尔街的师兄师姐,敬仰的不得了,
      也没太搞清楚他们到底在干什么,但觉着那就是我的人生理想。在学校奋斗了二十
      年,不如愿的去了软件公司,一切只是为了生存。看着我的朋友,没有在乎过北京
      户口,美国绿卡,工资洋房,没有在乎过别人怎样看他们,锲尔不舍,在很多领域
      都很成功。别的人可能只看见他们成功了,可是作为朋友,我深深的理解他们所经
      历的挫折,承担的风险,和不懈的毅力。想借这个机会把一些想法整理一下。希望感兴趣的朋友一起参与讨论。

      一: 你如何看自己?(How do you perceive yourself?)

      很多时候,我们会抱怨因为种种原因我们没能过上自己想过得生活。经常羡慕别人
      的成功,想不明白自己道路如何选择。让我们做一个练习:给自己几分钟,想想以
      下的两个问题,拿出一张纸,写下你的答案。请不要跳过去,思考的过程是最有帮
      助的。

      1。假设钱不是你的问题,而且你做任何事情都没有可能失败,请写下在你的一生几
      十年里想做的事情。用你最大限度的想象力,写下来你可能想都不敢想的答案。

      2。假设你最终有机会去参加自己的葬礼,你的亲人,朋友,同事,生前所参与的社
      团都来参加葬礼。你有机会听到每一个人对你的最后致词,你想听到什么,希望每
      一个人说什么 (第二个问题来自steven Covey)

      我第一次做这样的练习实在一个朋友Terry的家里。他是一个personal coach。我绞
      尽脑汁,满脑子装满了从小教育的结果。我写下了 - 成功的职业,赚很多钱,周游
      世界,有一个幸福的家庭。Terry让我大胆的想,想那些潜意识里觉着不可能的事。
      说实话,我的理想就这么多,想不出别的。即使这点理想,都不知如何达到。

      我的眼界是有限的。如果我看不到山顶,就永远也不会达到那里。很多时候,我们
      想的问题是:下一年我的工资会长多少;下一次升职会是什么时候;我什么时候把
      自己的技术练的更强,以寻找到更好的职位;别人都有绿卡公民,我得等到什么时
      候。。。这时别人的理想变成了我们的理想,我们锲尔不舍的追求社会和他人所定
      义的优秀。即使达到了,又会患得患失,看看周围的人,想着自己原本应该追求另
      外一种理想。这可能是为什么国内工作时,羡慕出国留学的同学,在国外求学等绿
      卡,又羡慕回国创业的人。

      打个比方,把人生看作是一个旅途 - 我们拿着地图找芝加哥。看着地图,我们一目
      了然,都知道要找最近的路。可是如果我们根本不知道芝加哥在哪,我们往哪走?
      我们打听了很多人,有人说在东边好,东边有芝加哥,有人说西边有芝加哥。我们
      一会往东,一回往西,一头雾水,却没问几个为什么,还有什么办法能帮我们找到
      目的地。也许这样的随机行走(Random Walk) 把我们带到一个美丽的地方,我们又决
      定不去芝加哥了。我们也许在地图上找到芝加哥了,可是道路艰险,路边的风景又
      很美,我们决定先享受能得到的,想想再说。

      最后有几个人完成了这个旅途呢?我们不知道。我想问题的根源是我们还不清楚到
      底要做什么。是的,很少有人能够生来就站在巨人的肩膀上看人生。不断的寻找人
      生的方向是需要巨大的勇气和毅力的。先别抱怨,使劲想想自己到底想有一个什么
      样的人生,在一个理想的世界里,你会要什么。在死的那一天,我们希望自己的孩
      子,爱人,朋友如何看待自己。这可能不是一天两天的工作,哪怕花了几年能想明
      白一些问题,都是值得的。

      最近我的一个女朋友来 Wharton读书,有机会和她续续旧,谈谈近况。她学的是金
      融,最终在北京开了一个医疗器械公司。她毕业后在一个国有国际贸易公司工作,
      经常出国,旱涝保收。她不喜欢没有挑战的生活,跳到了投资银行。每天苦学,苦
      干,颇有成就,但觉着不是自己最终想追求的生活。很多日子里她就是在想,想,
      想自己到底喜欢做什么。“创业”的概念越来越清晰,只是极没可能,象一个遥远
      的梦。但是她的愿望相当强烈,便开始不断的寻找各种机会。他后来的老公,当时
      的同事说,她那时一天天神神叨叨,不知道在忙什么。在她从国有贸易公司辞职的
      那一天,家里人就反对,希望一个女孩有份稳定的工作和家庭。她读各种书,跟各
      种人谈,寻找方向和机会。在她的心里上完全做好准备后,一个小机会给了她灵感,
      她开始找人一起研制一种低成本医疗器械。她的决心和准备终于得到了家里人的精神支持。产品成功的那一天,她辞职了,开始了她全职的,漫长的寻找投资的道路,没
      有任何收入,没有什么前景。投资人说她太年轻,她去买框架眼睛,老式西装。投
      资人想把她甩开,模仿她的产品;投资人嫌她没有经验,公司没有前途。一个又一
      个,半年过去了,没有人愿意投资。她的一句名言是:每当你觉着自己就要不行的
      时候,再挺一挺,就在最后的时候,总会有希望。终于,她找到了投资,产品很长
      时间不盈利,她和合伙人想了很多办法,又挺过来了。公司已经步入正规。

      她在实践中寻找着自己的理想。其实她的理想没有结束。她从来没停止思考。她说,
      最初就是要挣钱。现在她想发展对社会有价值的环保产品。她看到了中国年轻企业
      家难找资金,投资者苦于没有好项目的现状,她想做一家风险投资公司,帮助私有
      企业发展。这个梦想把她带到了Wharton。我想她和很多Wharton同学不同只出是:
      她有一个很强烈的愿望,一个很执着的梦;她已经在把握自己的人生,而不是为了
      去高薪的投资银行或者是资讯公司而苦恼。

      举了一个很长的例子是说,寻找人生方向是很难的一件事。因为她是我的朋友,我
      可以清清楚楚的看见,为什么当年的小丫头会成为今天的企业家,不是她的资智,
      不是她的关系,而是她真的寻找了,真的动手去做了。当我们读很多成功人的故事,
      都惊叹他们的领导能力,交流能力,他们的眼光和魄力。其实他们的成功和能力,
      都是不断失败,探索的结果。他们真正的特殊的才能是 -- 行动与坚持。

      不是每个人都要成为企业家,都要“出人头地”。一个好母亲,好妻子也是一种人
      生理想。只是在抱怨之前想一想,我们是不是真的知道自己想要什么。有的人愿意
      享受澳大利亚的田园风光,家庭的天伦只乐,如果你不愿意,你想好了自己想要什
      么?如果简单的工作不愿意干,复杂的工作又不愿意扎扎实实学习专业知识,管理
      技巧,或者是营销技能,问问自己愿意吃苦做什么?如果别的人的理想成为你前行
      的航标,你就会觉得人生充满遗憾,因为无论朝哪个方向走,你都会留恋别人路上
      的风景,东南西北不断的追随别人,到头来还在自己的港湾打转。

      “Do you want to become a wandering generality or a meaningful specific?"
      我们的路只有靠自己才能走好。

      未完待续
      二:寻找方向和理想更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net